Strange Bedfellows

Sleep. 

The elusive.  The taunting.  The fickle.

I had forgotten what trying to sleep while pregnant felt like.  It's not just the aches and pains.  It's not just the stuffy nose.  It's not just the fear of crushing your poor baby as you launch your body into seven different positions.  

It's the combination of all of these things.

I don't remember having this hard of a time falling asleep last time I was pregnant.  Then again, last time I was pregnant, I was still jogging and feeling relatively good by the second trimester.  

This time around I feel even more lethargic, which you would think meant I would have no problem falling asleep.  Alas, this has not been the case.  If its not my hips bothering me, it would be my arms.  If it wasn't my back that felt twisted, it would be how hot I would get.  And always, always, always, I would have to get up to pee at least four times.

Since I couldn't really do anything about that last one, I thought maybe I could at least think of a way to make my body more comfortable lying down.  I tried stuffing pillows everywhere - between my knees, cradled behind my back, hugging one around belly.  But nothing seemed to help.  

My friends and coworkers kept asking if I tried a body pillow and many asked if I wanted to borrow theirs but I kept refusing because I figured it wouldn't do me any good.  I had already contorted myself so completely with pillows that I must've looked just like a pile of microfiber and limbs at night.  And besides, I worried about bringing in something that big into the bed (insert tasteless joke).

Finally, after one particularly agonizing night, I got up, rubbed my aching, burning hips, and decided it wasn't the pillow configuration.  It was the mattress.  After several years and one pregnancy already, our mattress has taken some punishment.  And while it is still comfortable in normal circumstances, it just wasn't measuring up to the task of holding up my big body a second time.  My friend Jen recommended a mattress topper with a thick foam base to help with giving me some extra support.  I did some research and found one that was highly rated and not too expensive.  The only hitch was that I had to unfurl the thing when it arrived and let it reinflate for 48 hours before I could use it.  So I had to keep walking by my guest room like an anxious baker, watching and waiting for cake to rise.

Finally it was time.  Joe and I hauled the big blue pad onto our mattress and put the mattress protector and fitted sheet over it.  For the first time in weeks I couldn't wait to hop into bed.  

Surprisingly, I didn't "hop" so much as "sunk".  

The first night was a little tricky.  We both found ourselves not exactly cradled, but more like enveloped in a thick sponge made of pudding.  Moving around or shifting took some effort.  I would flail my arms about to get enough momentum to haul myself off just to go to the bathroom every hour and half.  And the cooling gel that were supposed to keep your body at a comfortable temperature didn't seem to kick in as I was constantly kicking the covers away from even touching me.  I began to worry I made a mistake.

But I wasn't about to give up yet.  We took the mattress cover off the topper so that we could get the cooling effects more directly.  By the second night, I began to enjoy the feeling of being trapped in squishy comfort.  Whereas the mattress alone was rigid and indifferent, the mattress topper was inviting, almost aggressively so.  It was like a really clingy boyfriend who just wanted to hear about your day while rubbing your shoulders and wouldn't let you go, even to go to the bathroom.  It was nice, but it was still missing something.

Then a few days ago my friend Sylvan stopped by for a quick visit.  She had just had a beautiful baby of her own and I was so excited to meet her and to offer a little dish to take home for dinner.  But she also had things for me, including her big body pillow.  At first I was going to beg off from taking it, but then I thought, maybe this is the final key.  Maybe this is the last component I need to unlock a good night's sleep.

Well, its been a week, and I now have all three things that I need in my bed.  My firm, supportive mattress, my soft pushover mattress topper, and my sinewy, seductive body pillow that seems to go everywhere I need it to.  

Oh and Joe.  I have Joe, who is the best thing above all that I have in my bed :)

But sleep is no longer totally elusive.  In fact, as I write this, my mattress and topper cradling my back and bum, and the body pillow wrapped around my shoulders, sleep is inevitable.  Sometimes.....too inetiavle....um, I mean...invariable.........

Night night.